I LOVE MY JOB!!!! I have been an infant teacher at Growing Brilliant for almost two months now, & although it’s had its challenges (like both my co-teachers are out & all of a sudden I’m in charge while three new kids start & the only other teachers sent to help me are brand new & have no idea what to do in my classroom!!!), but it has grown me in amazing ways! I spent a good portion of last week redesigning my classroom, organizing & getting things ready as the new school year starts tomorrow. I am so thankful for God opening up this door for me, & of course the wonderful kids I get to serve & love on each & every day. :,) the joy in my heart cannot be contained; it was showing real big on my face while my boss took this photo of me!!!! I am happy. #ilovebabies
I am officially a member of The Life Center Church! & I really want to explain why this is such a huge deal for me. My journey with church community has been an extremely painful one; full of hurt, disappointment & desperation. In fact, church is what kept me away from God for so many years.
My parents gave their lives to Jesus ten years ago & growing up, church was just something we did but not something we lived. After my family met Jesus, we went more consistently on Sundays to church. Shortly afterward, my parents started attending two different churches. I would go with my mom but, it was so big & unfamiliar I wasn’t into it at all. At this time, my family started experiencing a real divide & that was confusing for me.
Shortly after that, I started getting more involved in the youth group & making more friends. To make a long story short, I got trapped in a very abusive situation with a leader & member of this church. It was so hard for me during this time, to see this person raising their hands in worship yet knowing the evil they would inflict upon me just moments before. These assaults would happen at church, yet no one knew. No one could see my cries for help & even though I showed up every week, I was left in my pain & isolation. Each assault that happened on that church’s campus I was told that “God told [them] to do it to me”. Eventually, after 2 years, I stood up for myself & the church took the other’s side. I was asked to leave, was told I needed to pray for them for they were a “lost sheep” who needed our love & support, & was told that the problem was me being disrespectful to my parents. I left that place & entered into the darkest period of my life. I lost all friends I had made during that time, & lost my faith. How could this be God’s people?
I gave my life to Jesus three years ago, & boy has He healed me in incredible ways. But I’ve never gotten involved in a church since.
Until today.
Today I followed the Holy Spirit’s prompting & committed. I stepped out of my comfort zone, put aside my doubts & fears, & trusted that church CAN be a safe place.
Becoming a member at this church is not only a step of faith saying I am going to co
Just an overflow of my heart kind of post:
God has been (not so gently) reminding me that it is not about me. & I am just so overjoyed & so thankful! With how big this relationship is, how overwhelming dialysis & all the medical details are, it is a huge relief to remember that not only can I NOT do it alone, I’m not expected to. Only God knows, only God has the power, the answers, the strength to hold Jeremy in His hands & I simply don’t have to. •
This relationship...oh it has had its fair share of tough days, rough seasons, end-of-the-rope kind of moments. But what a peace it brings to my heart when I am reminded that when we reach the end of ourselves, there is a God so much bigger & so much stronger than us. These past few months (maybe even year!!), I have tried so hard to take it upon myself, relied on my own abilities & my own knowledge & understanding when I should’ve always been turning to God. •
When I think about a future with Jeremy, it can be scary & overwhelming. But when I remember that the point is not me, my mind is at ease. It doesn’t matter how big the ring is, or the wedding, or if I get the house I want, or the job I want, or the job I want Jeremy to have or any degrees or dogs or romantic dates or the perfect living room or the steady routine or big vacations. It doesn’t matter if we do dialysis forever, it doesn’t matter if there’s a transplant or not. At the end of it all I am going to stand before God, held accountable for how I took on the role He gave me in Jeremy’s life.
Did I love as Christ loved? Did I die to myself, & live for Christ? Did I serve without asking anything in return? Did I submit my will to God’s? Did I encourage Jeremy toward a deeper, more intimate relationship with Christ? Did I lead a good example of living for Christ? Did I unconditionally love & support him, always? Even in the moments where he physically could not give anything in return? •
At the end of it all, it doesn’t matter what I want or if my needs are met, what matters is God. & the point of this relationship is not just for a friend, or to have fun or to be romantic & post cute pics or even to make memories or grow together. The point is to glor
